Dazed

I may never know why I always feel a certain level of attraction to older (and sometimes MARRIED!) men.

Maybe because they are easier to talk to.
Maybe because they actually (or they seem) to be listening.
Maybe because they know how to pay attention ( which I lack )
Maybe because they know how to treat a woman.
Maybe because they're done with the phase of impressing people.
Maybe because they know what they want in life.
Maybe because.

It happened and it is still happening.
More than once.
More than twice.
Ugh!
More than thrice.

And although I am pretty ashamed to let myself do the things that I am doing, I can't stop.

I love being the object of their affection.
AND ATTENTION.

Like, Ariel, for example.
He is married.
His wife used to be my boss.
And yet, I let him hold me and kiss me.

Dennis.
Whom I just began to hang out with.
I don't know. But he's giving me mixed signals.
And I love being with him.
He makes me feel.... wanted and adored and beautiful.



By the way, I saw Aaron today.
He was looking really nice. And he was disappointed that I can't come with him to Zambo. Heck, I can't even come with him to his condo unit in Binondo! But then, he was too charming, I can't stop him when he kissed me!


I can't stop.